National Association of Marriage Enhancement


At Christmas time, we have bought into the consumer mentality. It is what we get each other that make us happy. All over the Internet you can find lists suggesting gifts for your wife. There is nothing wrong with these lists; they often help men who are not naturally talented in the gift-giving department. However, consumerism assumes that all desires are tangible things that can be bought. This Christmas, as you continue the tradition of exchanging gifts, try to remember something very important. Most likely what your wife really wants is a helpful and considerate husband!

1 Peter 3:7 says, “Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.” (ESV)

God requests husbands to be considerate and supportive, and this command is so important to Him that He actually may reject your prayers. A truly godly life is not one that is in prayer so often that he rejects his wife. No! A truly godly man spends time serving and caring for his wife like God desires, and God is much happier to receive his prayers. When the verse above says that woman is a weaker vessel, it is not talking about her standing with God or her abilities; the verse means that women often need the help of their husband. It is scientifically proven that generally women need more sleep than men, yet women often have more straining jobs. Now a days, men often are sitting at a desk all day and the wife either works out of the house or at home raising children and then still is often seen as the primary cook and cleaner. Men, your wives do a lot for you; so as you appreciate them this Christmas with gifts, consider also that the best gift may be to do dishes after Christmas dinner or to put the kids to bed when she is exhausted. Helpfulness and consideration are two of the cheapest and oldest gifts in the book, yet they have still retained the utmost value.