National Association of Marriage Enhancement

Spice Up Your Marriage

Is your over-planning hurting your marriage? In every marriage, one person is always a bit more (or a lot more) of a planner than the other. One may be prone to marking up the calendar, while the other is prone to just “wing it.” Both tendencies can be harmful to your marriage when they are too extreme. This section will be a bit different this month because we wrote something different for each of you based on your tendencies. The final goal of two people working on what may irritate their spouse should lead to a happier couple who feels more understood in their marriage.

To The Spontaneous One: Spice up your marriage with organization! You may feel like the fun or relaxed one in the marriage or maybe like you are too frazzled to deal with calendars and bills, but most likely your spouse is feeling bogged down by a lot of the responsibilities and the slack that they have to pick up. If you organize your life a little better, your spouse will see that you are making efforts to be helpful and that will minister to him/her greatly.

To The Over-Organizer: Spice up your marriage with spontaneity! You may feel like if you don’t stick to the plan that everything may unravel. Unfortunately, your spouse could be feeling as though he/she is not a priority when they are competing with the calendar. If you cancel a meeting to spend quality time or have spontaneous sex (even though it may not be that night of the week), you could show your spouse how important they really are to you.

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